Here we are. Tuesday--the day of reckoning. In a few hours, a test. A few hours after that, a presentation.
It's funny, I have no fear for the test and I'm terrified of the presentation, even though I'm really well prepared for the presentation and not so much for the test.
Ever since I was little I've had trouble dealing with these kinds of things. It makes no sense either. I know completely that all my fear and trepidation is internal. I know I know the material. I know I'll probably mess up a little. I can almost predict how the whole thing is going to go.
And yet my mind won't be still. It's rushing over scenarios like a bored channel surfer.
I should be more confident. I should not let my fears control me. I should use them to my advantage. I am in control.
When you shut down the internal machine, everything is so clear. The world simply IS. Everything that you thought becomes just memory. The trick is to not focus on that memory. The trick is to recognize that this is now and this is really happening and you are completely in control of everything you do.
Now, if I could just believe that.
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